Monday, September 28, 2015

Britton Knox Danner

He's here! Our baby BOY is finally here. 

Britton Knox was born on a beautiful fall day, September 20th, 2015 at 12:34 pm. He weighed 9 lbs, 4 oz and was 21 inches long.

The night before Britton was born, Matt, the kids and I had dinner with my parents who were in town for a pickle ball tournament. I was two days over due. We talked about how we didn't think this baby would ever come and how praying for patience is never a good idea. My parents headed back up to Colorado that night not knowing that they would be headed back down the next morning. 

Feeling a little bit discouraged that I still didn't have a baby in my arms and not wanting to face another round of "no baby yet?" and "praying we don't see you next Sunday"s, (all from very loving people who were just as anxious for me to have a baby as I was), we opted to skip church the next morning. We planned on having a relaxing Sunday where we would gear up for another week. 

Around 6 O'Clock Sunday morning, I woke up to go to the bathroom. When I laid back down my back started to hurt. And then it stopped. And then it started again. And then it stopped. And then it started again….You get the idea, labor had begun! 

I started timing the contractions, woke Matt up and got dressed. The contractions were starting to get more painful and a little more consistent. We woke up the kids, dropped them off at their aunt's house and headed down town to the hospital. Strangely, the freeway was closed at 6:30 on a Sunday morning. We managed to get there anyway and when we arrived at Triage the nurse said: "What brings you in today?"

I was 3 cm when they checked me. The nurse and the midwife kept saying things like: "If this is labor…." I was pretty sure it was but I guess the baby wasn't responding to the contractions like they wanted him too, something about an old placenta. (?) The plan was to get the baby to respond and then send me for a walk. Well by the time they wanted me to walk, I could barely move and the contractions were killing me. I guess I was screaming pretty loud because every nurse in triage found their way to my room to see what was going on. When they checked me again, I was 6 cm. Things were moving fast and I was beginning to panic because it hurt and I wanted the drugs. 

The nurses (there were like 5 in the room at this point) began poking me for an IV so I could get the epidural as soon as they moved me into labor and delivery. Apparently, I have bad veins because they tried in 4 different places before calling the anesthesiologist, in to get the job done. (I'm pretty sure I was freaking out at this point). When that was finally over with, they raced me into another room at Labor and Delivery. I had my eyes closed the whole time but it seemed like we were flying down the hall. 

Once we got to our room, everyone got hats and masks for the epidural and Matt got a special chair directly in front of me. (Have I mentioned how great Matt was? He deserved that special chair) I was 8 cm at this point and they didn't think it would work. Thankfully it did. In fact, it worked so well that at one point I couldn't feel my chest and had a hard time breathing. And then I started to freak out again. They put me on oxygen and lowered the dosage. 

At this point, things slowed down. I couldn't feel the contractions anymore, I was still on oxygen but able to relax. Matt and I both closed our eyes for a little while and some where in there my parents finally checked their phone and started to head back down to Albuquerque. 

Somewhere around 11 O'Clock or so, as they began to lower the dosage of the epidural, I felt the need to push, like really felt it. I didn't remember this feeling with my other two deliveries and I started to panic. Again. Thankfully, Matt was a great coach and talked me out of panic mode for what must have been the third time that day. 

I didn't have to push for very long before we had a baby. According to Matt, he came out "spread eagle" so announcing the sex was much easier this time. It was a boy! We were thrilled and so so surprised. Another little boy.

They placed him on my chest right away without even cutting the cord. I held him for an hour after he was born. A whole hour before they even touched him! I'm tearing up as I type this. I had never gotten to do that with my other babies and I was so thankful. The midwife said right away that he wouldn't have to go the NICU and Matt and I were both praising the Lord for answering our prayers. He had given us a healthy baby boy. 

When they did finally take him from me to measure and weigh him, Matt looked out the window and said "Its a beautiful fall day to have a baby." And it was. 

Turns out, Britton was another big boy, like his brother. He weighed in at 9 lbs and 4 oz, after having just pooped and peed.

My sweet parents arrived probably about 5 minutes after Britton was born and they were so patient, hanging out in the waiting room until they could come in and see him. 

Addy and Remi got to meet Britton that night. We were a little worried about Addy since she wanted a sister so bad but she was in love at first sight. 

Sweet Remi might have been a little confused but he was excited to sit in my lap and hold the baby. He also learned his name right away. 

Holy cow, we have 3 kids!

All my babies together at last.

Matt and I spent the night in the hospital with Britton, our first time having a baby in the room with us and it felt so much more normal. The next day, a little over 24 hours later we were able to go home. It felt a little surreal but we were so thankful. 

What a blessing it has been to be recovering at home with all of our kids under one roof. 

We give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. 

Thursday, September 17, 2015

40 Weeks with Baby D #3

I have to admit that I was hoping to not have to write a 40 week blog post. I would much rather be snuggling my little one, but as it turns out, I'm not in control. 

Today is Baby Danner's due date, the day we've been waiting 10 months for. And although it feels a little anti-climatic, I'm thankful that baby is still safe and growing smarter and bigger.

Trying to have a little fun while waiting on baby.

I have about two shirts and a pair of pants that still fit, my feet are swollen and my long slender fingers have turned into man hands. My back hurts and I think I got up almost every hour to use the bathroom last night. 

I'm definitely ready to be done, BUT God is good. I've received a lot of sweet messages with people checking up on me. We had a fun morning with cousins, Addy and Remi are playing well and making me smile and there are some fun things going on this weekend that will be fun to go to if Baby doesn't make an appearance. I'm tired but trying to trust in His timing.

"My times are in your hand." Psalm 31:15

Looking forward to my next update introducing you to our new little one!

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

39 Weeks and 5 Days with Baby D #3

Tomorrow I will be two days away from my due date. Two. Days.

Our lives will be forever changed any minute from now or 1-2 weeks from now. Waiting on a baby is the weirdest thing right? There's nothing like waiting on a baby to remind you how much you are NOT in control. Some days I am better at giving up that control than others. Today, I am trying really hard to trust in His timing and not my own. 

Today I am 39 weeks and 5 days pregnant and can greatly relate with this lady that I found on Pinterest.

I've entered Stage 5 of pregnancy according to the Scary Mommy blogger:

"You feel enormous and none of your maternity clothes fit. You want to crash through walls and shout “oh yeah!” like the KoolAid man. People keep saying “Haven’t you had that baby yet?” You have a new appreciation for how difficult it is for the elderly and morbidly obese to get around and swear you’re going to become an advocate for their rights once you catch your breath. You’re no longer scared of birth you just want this kid out of you and if that means pulling it through your right nostril, so be it."

That pretty much sums it up. I could add to the list of aches and pains and reasons why I am so done being pregnant, but instead, I'll leave you with a few lines from a book that I picked up again tonight after not giving it much thought at first. I was just telling someone the other day that I didn't really care for the book, Loving the Little Years, because it had too many analogies or metaphors or whatever those things are called. I wasn't really getting anything out of it. But in my insomnia,  I gave it another chance and found some really encouraging words in chapter 14 titled "Me Time" that I thought were particullary encouraging giving my current state.

"Motherhood is what your stomach was made for - and any wear and tear that it shows is simply the sign of a well-used tool. We are not to treat our bodies like museum pieces. They were not given to us to preserve, they were given to us to use. So use it cheerfully, and maintain it cheerfully."

The author goes on to say:

"Scars and stretch marks and muffin tops are all part of your kingdom work. One of the greatest testimonies Christian women have in our world today is the testimony of joyfully giving your body to another while so many women choose to not have children or abort the children that they were given, the testimony of women who know the cost and joyfully pay it is profound……… So realize that your body  is a testimony to the world of God's design. Carry the extra weight joyfully until you can lose it joyfully."

That last part is something I definitely want to remember in the next months as getting dressed becomes the question of "what will fit today." I want to enjoy my new baby and when the time comes, work hard to loose that weight with a joyful heart. I'm sure I will have to look back at this several times.

I read a few other chapters and they were all so good and so timely, which seems to be a theme lately. God is using books and bible studies to speak to my heart, just where I am at and I am so thankful. And since I have the worst memory ever, I do my best to document and put things in places where I can look back on them. I usually do that here, which is the reason for the quote overload today. Sorry friends.

In that same chapter in Loving the Little Years, the author Rachel Jankovic, suggests that our identity as Christian women is intertwined with our family, our husband and children. I would ague that our identity is actually in Christ and finding our identity in other people could be a dangerous thing, however, she did have a good point in that we don't need a day alone to shop to "rediscover ourselves" or find out what we are really all about. Instead if we're looking for "me time," she suggested going on a date with your husband or doing something special with your kids. And I think that I will do just that. 

Instead of banking a bunch of alone time before the baby comes, because who knows when I will get it again, I'm going to take the kids out to do something fun tomorrow. It probably won't be life changing, because it's pretty hard to move, but maybe I'll buy them a scone at Starbucks and let them pick out a drink that they always ask for, because it will only be just the two of them for so much longer. Hopefully not too much longer, but you get the idea. 

Here's to ceasing the day! Carpe Diem and all that.

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Adelyne is 4 and a Half Years Old!

Today is Addy Grace's half birthday.

Im a weird mom and don't usually feel emotional or sad at birthdays, but on half birthdays I feel all the emotions. Tomorrow she will be closer to five than four. And five brings us closer to kindergarten and middle school and driving on her own and before we know it, she will be getting married and having babies of her own. Someone hold me.

But in all seriousness, do any of you other mommas feel like more changes come around their half birthday? Maybe I notice them more because Im not busy planning a party and shopping for birthday gifts.


This little lady can get dressed all on her own and for the most part does a pretty good job at putting her outfits together. We've made a deal that she can pick out her clothes on the days we don't go to church and on the other days I try really hard to let her have some creative freedom and only give a few guidelines to make sure everything fits and is decent. 

We recently upgraded to a van to accommodate our growing family and during that process Addy became obsessed. She loves to make vans out of all our kid chairs and uses pillows for the doors. Her and Remi go on several trips with all their "kids" and pack their van out with snacks and blankets and anything else their kids might need. 

Addy doesn't have an imaginary friend but there is an imaginary dog named Olive that goes with us almost everywhere and sometimes even takes the form of one of her stuffed animals. 

At four and half, she's definitely out grown her afternoon nap but can sometimes be found napping during quiet time, taking a little snooze on the couch while I make dinner or even dozing during church. 

She's shy and reserved like her momma around most people, but when you put her around family and good friends she can be pretty silly and goofy like her dad. She's actually turning into quite the little chatterbox and we often have to remind her of the appropriate times to talk and when to be quiet. 

Addy loves to wear high heels and princess crowns around the house but has also developed an interest in snakes and other amphibians. 

She continues to be a wonderful little momma to her babies and often imitates our friends that have little ones by "feeding" her dolls under blankets. We already know she will (and is) going to be a great big sister and we're excited to see her love on another little sibling soon.

She's challenging us in new and frustrating ways but continues to warm our hearts as she learns new things and loves on her family. She's probably the best person to have around on your birthday since she doesn't let a "Happy Birthday" go unsaid and will enjoy each birthday activity just as much as you do if not more. 

We are so thankful for our sweet little Addy Grace and can't wait to see what the next 6 months and years have in store for her.